This hill is for sledding, dammit!

So you have probably heard that the east coast got some snow this weekend.  Here on the South Shore of Long Island we got about a foot, give or take.  I have already had a kind person inquire as to whether my dark cloud reared its ugly head (thank you!), but I have to say it's all good.  I worked from home yesterday (there is no way I'm travelling on the LIRR if there is the possibility of even a single snowflake), the mini-me’s schools closed early but I was here so didn’t have to scramble to find someone to get them, and even though it was Mini-me the Elder's BD yesterday it was an easy switch to bring dinner in instead of going out (she is obsessed with KFC and we rarely let her get it so I think she was happier!) and her mini-party for today was easily moved to tomorrow since we went small this year as we are semi-homeless and all three girls could make the switch (if it had been past years' 15 girl party-paloozas in the house that would have been a different story – finally a benefit to not being in the house!).  So nary a sign of the dark cloud.  Hurray!

We went sledding at a local park, at which I have sledded when it snows since I was little.  Oh the memories.  This was considered the safe place to sled - there was another park with bigger hills but tons of trees and rumor had it that the kids who went there populated the emergency rooms around town (my parents did tend to err on the safe side – but the park we went to was closer so that had a lot to do with it as well- my Father believed closer always trumped better).  A good friend's family had an actual wood toboggan which really flew down the hill (and I hadn't yet read Ethan Frome so I wasn't scared of crashing, plus if you recall from a sentence ago we weren't at the tree-filled park of death).  And, in my favorite story, my older sister, (who was there to help watch us) broke her ankle.  Ironically, not sledding, just walking to go help out another kid; and no, not one of us that she was supposed to be watching (she’s really very kind – this is whose apartment we are in right now).  We of course kept sledding as she sat there by herself on a sleigh, waiting for my Mother to get the car (hey, it was bad enough we had to leave early, we weren’t stopping to keep the klutz company).  And, in a stupendously thoughtless act, our neighbors’ kid who came with us asked her to get up so he could switch sleighs since she was on the “good” one.  Which she did.  I would have given him a few choice words.  Again, she is the kind one.  

And I still love to sled.  Like ice skating, it is a cold weather activity I can bear, and I want my kids to enjoy it as well (the elder has gone before - this was the younger's first time but she is fearless so we knew it would be fine).  Now granted it was a bit chaotic - it was really, really crowded and the cops closed off the park to cars since everything was full.  I was ready to turn around (I am tenacious on some things – you know like getting my way - but give up in about two seconds on others) but Big Guy (who I might add did not grow up here) knew a back entrance to the park.  I did not ask how he knew it and am not sure I want to know.   So off we went.  We even met up with a friend of Mini-Me the Elder’s so that was nice as well.  But you know something irked me...I wouldn't be my own snarky self otherwise.

There were people snowboarding!  These are tiny little hills for sledding and perhaps some tubing.  But snowboarding?  First of all, snowboarding is hard and most people under any circumstances can't do it - when you are at the local park (read “free”) that percentage goes up to about 99% - I guess they figured what the heck, let me borrow a board and give it a try.  You cheap bastards – go to a real mountain and take a lesson.  When you fall off a sled, you fall and the sled keeps going on the ground, relatively harmless (especially the plastic ones).  When you are on a snowboard, if you go down, it tends to go up, flying through the air, reinvented as a deadly projectile (and my parents thought trees were bad).   Then there are the 1% (relax, it’s just the remaining percentage of the people, I’m not getting political here) who can actually snowboard.  It is killing them that they are not somewhere on a real mountain, but they can’t pass up fresh powder and they go full speed for about 10 seconds down the hill.  Does this really work for them?  I mean, I love to read but the side of the cereal box does nothing for me.  Meanwhile, I have a four year old who doesn’t know better and is oblivious to her surroundings (and a nine year old who should know better but is also oblivious) just waddling into their path.   

And, I also have to give a minor snark-out to the people who got their kids pseudo-snowmobiles instead of sleds.  If you are having trouble picturing this, it is basically a bike with skis instead of wheels.  And they are sending their kid (they all looked to be between the ages of 5-9) down an icy hill filled with other kids on it.  Yes, they have handlebars for steering.  No, it did not look like a single kid knew how to properly steer it.  

These hills are for sledding dammit!  If you can’t do that one thing, stay away.